How to Choose a Wedding Photographer

“My sister takes good pictures of her kids. I’m sure she’ll do a good job at our wedding.” “We’ll just use disposables.” “I don’t like wedding photographers. They’re so pushy!”

We’ve all heard (and even thought) these reasons when trying to justify paying for a professional wedding photographer. But do you really want to put so much pressure on your sister? How do you know what images your guests will think are important? Why would you want disposable cameras for the one thing about your wedding that will last? And you get to choose who will spend the day with you and capture your images. Don’t pick someone who’s pushy!

These images are not simply snapshots of children on a playground. Weddings present a unique set of challenges, including venue restrictions, changing lighting, and interpersonal dealings. We pride ourselves on capturing each moment without disrupting the beauty of the day.

Take the time to get to know the photographer you’re thinking about choosing for your wedding. Meet for coffee. Set up an engagement session. Look at some examples and discuss what you hope to see in your images. Pay attention to your gut. If you feel uncomfortable, there’s probably a reason why. Do you want that same feeling of discomfort on your wedding day? Your photographer is the vendor you are likely to spend the most time with; your beautician, caterer, florist, DJ, etc. will have limited interaction with you on your wedding day. The photographer will have a back-stage all-access pass! Make sure you are completely comfortable.

Are You Speaking the Same Language?

This post is a continuation of last week's post: http://wellsandwellsphoto.blogspot.com/2011/08/what-to-do-when-personalities-conflict.html


Hi everyone!

Today, I'm going to tell you about another book that made a real difference for us as we were starting our married life together. As we discussed last week, we all have differences. These differences can be the basis of a great life of two individuals becoming one, strengths covering for weaknesses. But they can also be divisive, if not viewed in the right way.

So it is with the "love languages." Have you ever done something for your significant other, just because you love him/her, and felt unappreciated? You may be speaking your love language, but he/she may be listening with a different love language.

Huh? Let me explain. In the book "The Five Love Languages," Gary Chapman describes each language and how it is manifested in everyday life. For example, if your love language is "Receiving Gifts," you may spend most of your time working to provide not only a nice home for your family, but also to give lavish presents to your wife. However, if her love language is "Quality Time," she may resent all of the long hours that you spend working and feel that you are running away from intimacy with her. When you take the time to determine each of your love languages, you each can learn to show your love in a way that is understood and felt by the other.

My primary love language is "Acts of Service." I express love by doing things. I feel love the same way...if Mike does something nice for me, I feel loved. Mike's primary love language is "Words of Affirmation." He shows me that he loves me by telling me he is proud of me or that I've done something well. He needs to hear me say those types of things to him in order to feel loved. Of course, after 19 years of marriage, we know that we love each other. But that is not enough. If I don't take the time to actually use words of affirmation, he doesn't feel loved. And if he doesn't do stuff for me, I don't feel loved. So, in addition to expressing ourselves in our own primary love languages, we have learned to also become fluent in each other's.

Again, Amazon has a preview of the book, so that you can try it before you buy. http://www.amazon.com/Love-Languages-Secret-That-Lasts/dp/0802473156/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1313862196&sr=1-1

What resources have you found helpful as you have begun your journey together?

What to Do When Personalities Conflict

Hi everyone!

Today, I want to share with you one of the resources that Mike and I found invaluable as we began our life together. When we first got married, each of us thought that everyone thought alike. We didn't realize that each of us felt things differently and that we each had a different opinion of how situations should be handled. This led to conflict in our early days.

We found two books that have been particularly helpful for understanding each other. In the book Personality Plus, Florence Littauer explains not only the four major personality styles, but also how those styles create conflict. She further tells how to relate well and appreciate each other's strengths. In our case, I have personality traits of a people person who can be both introverted and extroverted, depending on the circumstances. Mike's basic personality is introverted with both perfectionist and people-pleasing tendencies. We found that my exuberance often embarrassed him, and that his meticulous attention to detail often frustrated me.

When we discovered Personality Plus, the lightbulbs went on. We finally understood that each of us has been created as an individual, and that our differences make our relationship unique. It helped us to understand not only each other, but also those around us. It became easier to interact with those who had different styles and to help them to understand us.. Amazon has a preview of the book, so that you can experience Littauer's writing style and decide whether or not you'd like to read it all the way through. http://www.amazon.com/Personality-Plus-Understand-Understanding-Yourself/dp/080075445X

Next week, we will share another of our favorite books: "The Five Love Languages."

Happy Anniversary, Teresa and Robert!

August 9, 2008

Wishing you many more to come!

August 1, 1992

That's when we got married! 19 years, and still going strong. We've made it through thick (waistlines) and thin (wallets). And we wouldn't have it any other way.

August 1 is also Mike's birthday! So, in honor of this very special day, we're going to be taking a little time off this week. We're taking this breather to enjoy each other's company. If you haven't had a chance to spend much time together lately, I urge you to do so soon. You'll be glad you did!